January 27, 2024 by Fred Colby
This and similar enticing messages run constantly on dating sites and social media pages used by widowers. Usually, they get your attention with a picture of an attractive young gal about half your age, usually with some cleavage showing. Unfortunately, these siren song messages go along with our being identified
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January 12, 2024 by Fred Colby
We widowers often hear that soon after the death of our wives we will lose many friends and possibly some family ties. This frequently occurs despite our best efforts to maintain these previously reliable and important relationships. This can result in: Questioning our likability, self-image, and ability to sustain relationships.
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January 8, 2024 by Fred Colby
Often after our wives pass, another crisis will come along that shakes us and causes us to confront our current state of thinking about our life going forward. This may be just what is needed to wake us and point us to a more promising future. While being prepped for
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December 1, 2023 by Brenda Goodman, CNN
(CNN) – At age 99, former President Jimmy Carter has been many things: humanitarian, Sunday school teacher, woodworker, naval lieutenant, father, husband. Now he’s facing a role that’s new to him but familiar to millions of older adults: that of a widower. Carter’s wife of 77 years, Rosalynn, died
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December 1, 2023 by Fred Colby
Whether quoting from Wayne’s World or the Bible, the phrase “I am not worthy” may describe how we feel at times after our wives pass away. A ritual of self-condemnation and feelings of inadequacy often overwhelm us, especially when we are alone. It is so easy to fall into a
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November 13, 2023 by Fred Colby
Shortly after my wife’s death, I went to the mountains by myself for a week and screamed as loud and often as I wanted to. But now, 7 years later, I no longer feel the anger I felt then. I now forget how easy it was to cut myself off
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October 23, 2023 by Fred Colby
Eight years ago, I found myself where many of you are today… in deep grieving mode and without the one person I could always rely upon to hear, support, and love me whenever I was facing a major challenge. I, like many of you, had to decide: Do I hide
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October 6, 2023 by Fred Colby
Since your wife died, how often have you been thoroughly confused by the kindness of women towards you? How often have you, even though you know it is wrong, thought there might be something there? I am not embarrassed to tell you that I had many such instances. For example,
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September 19, 2023 by Fred Colby
Just try to be angry and grateful at the same time. Hard, isn’t it? It is difficult because the focus on one interferes with your ability to do the other. Once we get past the numbness after our wife passes, we usually sink into a period of deep grieving that
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